A Cheat Sheet of Parenting Philosophies and Trends

Have you heard of or seen these parenting philosophies recently, but don't know what they mean? Authors Heather Gibbs Flett and Whitney Moss compiled a list of the trends in their book "Stuff Every Mom Should Know."

The terms below are defined for the purposes of helping you keep up with conversation or parenting news stories. For the most part, these labels serve to make mothers judge one another and, worse, judge themselves. So whether you’re a gung-ho practitioner of a particular parenting philosophy or a make-it-up-as-you-go-along-er, rest assured that no one will be testing you on this knowledge. Especially not your kids. (And we promise—we won’t judge.)

Authoritarian parenting: The parent is the leader, makes decisions, and does not need to rationalize to the child. This style of parenting earned media attention under the name “Tiger Mom.” (Even if you feel you fall far outside this realm, know that at some point we are all driven to say, “Because I said so!”)

Authoritative parenting: The parent provides structure and sets limits, but explains reasons for punishments in an effort to encourage independence. (“We don’t throw things because they might hurt someone or something, so I’m going to have you take a break from this toy.”)

Attachment parenting: This term is associated with three activities: baby-wearing, co-sleeping, and breastfeeding on demand rather than on a schedule. The philosophy is that children will grow up to be emotionally secure and enjoy higher self-esteem when they learn to separate from their parents at their own pace. Critics point out that this practice is extremely demanding on mothers. (“We don’t own a crib. Our baby sleeps with us at night and in a sling during the day.”)